Get to know me...?
Jan. 9th, 2025 01:56 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
penshuttergirl posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
findingfriendsDusting off my DW account. Just needing an outlet from my crazy life. ;)
Anyway. Here we go.
Is there an interesting story behind your username? Not super interesting, but I kind of ran with the fact that I am a writer and I love photography. :)
Location and language(s): I am American, live in the USA. I speak English.
Age range (e.g 20s, 30s, etc.): I’m in my late-40s.
Hot button/deal breaker issues that will likely lead to unfriending: Don’t lie to me. Like, ever. Don’t gaslight me. Don't try to flirt with me, privately or in the comments. This will end up in you getting blocked, no ifs, ands, or buts about it. I am happy with my life the way it is. Don't try to ask for more. Use proper grammar and spelling – what I mean by that is: If you’re writing something, spell out your words. It’s “you”, not “u”, “obviously”, not “obvs”, etc. Additionally, don’t write all your sentences as one long drawn out thing and I have to decipher (or attempt to decipher) where one sentence ends and the other begins. Painnnnnnnnnn! Seriously, though. Autocorrect can be beastly (and let’s be honest, a bit comical haha), but spell check is a thing, and it’s just courteous. Grammarly is free.
Do you have an "About Me" post new friends can read to get a sense of who you are, the people you talk about regularly, etc.? I do, actually! Might be a liiiiiiiiiittle out of date, though, but I am mindful of that, and when I throw in a post where there’s stuff about people I know in my personal life, I’ll either use fake names (because, y’know, names changed to protect the innocent/irritating/etc and doxxing is a thing anymore, and I’d rather not risk anyone’s safety, I don’t care how irritating or whatever a person may be!). Specific locations (in terms of like businesses, etc., I won’t use those names, either, I’ll just say something like, “So, we went to [business], and …” go from there. I don’t live in a small town (sadly), but still, I’m a huge fan of protecting privacy.
Is your profile up-to-date or at all useful? -SCRAMBLES TO CHECK PROFILE TO SEE IF IT’S NEEDING UPDATED- Uhhh… It’s pretty basic, but I tend to keep the “meatier” stuff for my posts. /shrug. -pauses right here to go back and update my “Getting to know me” post… haha-
List a few things you think it's important new friends know about you right away: I’m not someone to assume that just because I’m kind, does not mean that I’m a pushover. Additionally, even though I am really into my faith (it’s very important to me), I am not going to beat you over the head with my Bible. I know not everyone believes as I do, but I do know how to play nice with others, and I do know how to just patiently scroll past things that I may find I don’t agree with but would not have something constructive to bring to the conversation about it. :)
You mostly write about: I haven’t dusted off my account for a long time (honestly, I kept forgetting I have it), but at the risk of the whole, “NeW yEaR, nEw Me!” nonsense, I decided in the spirit of working on my stuff with my mental health and all the things going on in my life, in general (not that my life is SUPER exciting, but there’s stuff that I just want to write about and I’m sometimes too lazy [okay, okay, fine, ya caught me, I’m A LOT OF THE TIME too lazy haha] to write it down in my paper journal… I need an outlet, and LJ used to be my go-to for that type of thing, so may as well just come to DW (after all, I did create a DW account for a reason… haha) and do my thought-dumping here.
You never or very rarely write about: Politics. Time and place. I don’t have the time, and I very rarely make time, let alone place, for such nonsense.
Is your journal mostly public, locked, or a mix of public and locked? It’s locked. I have an ex I’m hiding from, and I try to keep specific-specific stuff locked, too, because I do have things going on that I don’t want IRL people to read and then play the “Jump to Conclusions” game (points if you get the reference!).
Do you use filters for certain types of posts (e.g. fandom-related posts, or posts about sex, or mental health issues, etc.)? I do “cut” longer posts, to offer the option to click on the cut if the person wants to keep reading my brain stew. I don’t know how to use the “filters” thing (yet), but if I’m going to write about something that potentially could be upsetting, I will put a trigger warning and offer a short description. For example, if I write about stuff I’d discussed in my therapy sessions that may have need to be further unpacked in here, and there are certain situations that may be triggering, I will offer, “TW: discussion of abuse, [other potential trigger inserted here]. Reader discretion advised!” and I will, regardless if it’s a shorter post or a longer one, put it behind a cut, with the disclaimer additionally labeled in the cut, and once the person clicks on said link to keep reading should they choose to do so, I’ll add an additional TW and multiple mouse scrolls down before the “meat” of the post happens. This is not only to protect the reader from potential sleeping brain goblins they have skulking around their own mind waiting to be bullies, but it is also to thwart the temptation of the reader to jump all over me about things that I post on my account about, “yOu DiDn’T waRn” or whatever else. Where I live, I have to (too often) talk to adults like they are children, even though said adults can – and should – pay attention.
Your posting frequency (e.g. daily, every few days, weekly, etc.): Well, as of today, it’s going to be hopefully daily, but it might be every few days, but at the minimum, a week is the goal, depending upon how busy I am!
Does your journal frequently include any of the following: memes, linkspams, gifs, photos, videos, etc? If I post memes, there won’t be a tonne of them. If I find one that really demands to be included in what I write about, then yes, I will include it. This isn’t my blog, just a “brain dump” space. My blog (which is another thing I need to dust off… oops...), I offer memes and such to the posts. The same goes for videos, links, … it depends on what I happen to be writing (or fussing) about. But all pictures – regardless if they are memes or elsewise – will be put behind a cut. :)
What do you enjoy most about journaling? It is an outlet for me to just organize the thoughts in my head, try to wrangle the brain goblins back into check, or sometimes just document something funny so I can go back and re-read later. Honestly, sometimes it can be – I’ve, personally, discovered – cathartic to go back over things that weren’t funny/lighthearted, after a lot of time has passed, to see how far I’ve come, to check and see where I am now vs then (growth, y’know). Places like this, too, also offer me a place to be able to interact with others, see how things are going with them, that sort of thing. I’m not a super social in-person type of person anymore (when you’re stuffed into your shell repeatedly, but then the same people who continually do the stuffing give “cute” statements of, “You should come out of your shell more!”, you kind of tend to become wary of all human interaction, trying to keep things at a bare minimum so as to not lose your humanness… just … my own opinion!).
How often do you read your friends list (e.g. daily, every other day, once a week, etc.)? Well, now that I’m going to be working at becoming more active on here, once I hop on to type stuff out that I need to get out of my head and put somewhere else so I can organize my own thoughts, I will make a vested effort to be a “frequent flyer” and check in on my friends list, too. After all, the connections are there, and I hate being a parenthetical presence in other people’s lives, I know how lonely that can be, so I try to be that person who makes a point to show up for people I care about.
You really enjoy reading about: Just be real. Don’t gotta be super detailed, don’t gotta offer all the personal details of your life, but if you’ve got something to say, I’ll read it. :) If there’s something I can bring to the proverbial conversation, I will. If it’s something you want to vent about, I’ll read it. Something funny you want to share with others? I’ll read it.
You have very little interest in reading about: Again, politics. Time and place. I don’t have the time, and I don’t make much space for those types of conversations. I also don’t have time for people spinning their stories where they’re “always” the victim in the narrative. I believe there are three sides to all stories: Person A’s, Person B’s, and the truth. I’m a pretty open-minded individual, not so much so my brain’s going to splatter out of my skull and onto the floor, but I’m also not willing to engage in arguments, either. While no, I’m not confrontational, I’m not going to be baited into an argument that really has zero reason to be had.
Your thoughts on journals that regularly include any of the following: memes, linkspams, gifs, photos, videos, etc? I prefer an even balance of this type of content and actual posts. If it’s strictly this type of content, if something catches my eye, sure I’ll read it, but if it doesn’t, then no harm, no foul. Either way, a person’s account is for their own use, and I’m not here to “police” what a person can/cannot post on their account. Just as I expect people to be respectful of the fact that what I post on my account, my account is for me to do with as I please.
When it comes to comments on your posts, what matters more -- quality or quantity? Quality. HANDS DOWN. QUAL-I-TY. :) Not everything needs a response.
Do you unfriend people who don't comment much, even if you know they are reading you regularly? The same way I would treat an IRL person in my life: you’d have to do something profoundly messed up for me to unfriend you, or you would just have to be a generally difficult person to be around – whether it is in person or in the wild, wild internet – because I do not have time (nor patience) to be around difficult people.
What is your approach when it comes to commenting on other journals? As I mentioned earlier, I will comment if I have something to add to the conversation. Not everything needs a reply, but if I feel like I have something of substance to say, I will.
When you friend someone, but things don't really click, do you unfriend them without warning, or do you send them a note first? How do you prefer to be unfriended in similar circumstances? Listen, man, if we don’t really click, the sun’s still gonna rise and set as it is intended to do so. No harm, no foul. If we don’t mesh, that’s okay. If you want to just quietly exit stage left, then that’s fine! I’m not going to chase after you and beg for an explanation. Same goes from my end of the equation: if we don’t mesh, for whatever the reason, I hope that it is understood that I will likely not give an explanation, either. If we just don’t click, we don’t click. No worries.
AND LASTLY
Friending memes often ask people to list their favourite TV shows, movies, books, etc., but more often than not, those aren't things people actually write about in their journal. Do you have any favourite TV shows, movies, books, etc., that you DO often write about -- not necessarily in a fandom sort of way, just in general? Hooooboy. How to answer this question… So. The short answer is, my journal is going to be a variety of things I’ll write about. Books, movies, telly shows (I really don’t watch telly, unless you count stuff I watch regularly on Hulu, etc.), yes, if there’s something I want to pick apart, comment about on my journal, yes. I’ll write about just about anything that crosses my mind and I want to pick it apart further.
Any final thoughts you'd like to share with potential new friends? I am not here for dates. I’m not here for people to “slide into the Dms” as they say and try to flirt with me. I am happy with where my life is, right now, how it is, and I’m not interested in anything more than that. Facebook has too many creeps (which is another reason I’m trying to get away from frequently using that site… what a cesspool it’s become!), I will just, on sight, block anyone who dares try to attempt such with me. I do not have time for any of that nonsense. I’m too old, too tired, and too set in my ways to budge on that. I am here to interact with other humans about life, not try to add someone to mine on THAT personal of a level. Don’t waste my time, and you won’t end up at my personal Block Party (see what I did there?).
Anyway. Here we go.
Is there an interesting story behind your username? Not super interesting, but I kind of ran with the fact that I am a writer and I love photography. :)
Location and language(s): I am American, live in the USA. I speak English.
Age range (e.g 20s, 30s, etc.): I’m in my late-40s.
Hot button/deal breaker issues that will likely lead to unfriending: Don’t lie to me. Like, ever. Don’t gaslight me. Don't try to flirt with me, privately or in the comments. This will end up in you getting blocked, no ifs, ands, or buts about it. I am happy with my life the way it is. Don't try to ask for more. Use proper grammar and spelling – what I mean by that is: If you’re writing something, spell out your words. It’s “you”, not “u”, “obviously”, not “obvs”, etc. Additionally, don’t write all your sentences as one long drawn out thing and I have to decipher (or attempt to decipher) where one sentence ends and the other begins. Painnnnnnnnnn! Seriously, though. Autocorrect can be beastly (and let’s be honest, a bit comical haha), but spell check is a thing, and it’s just courteous. Grammarly is free.
Do you have an "About Me" post new friends can read to get a sense of who you are, the people you talk about regularly, etc.? I do, actually! Might be a liiiiiiiiiittle out of date, though, but I am mindful of that, and when I throw in a post where there’s stuff about people I know in my personal life, I’ll either use fake names (because, y’know, names changed to protect the innocent/irritating/etc and doxxing is a thing anymore, and I’d rather not risk anyone’s safety, I don’t care how irritating or whatever a person may be!). Specific locations (in terms of like businesses, etc., I won’t use those names, either, I’ll just say something like, “So, we went to [business], and …” go from there. I don’t live in a small town (sadly), but still, I’m a huge fan of protecting privacy.
Is your profile up-to-date or at all useful? -SCRAMBLES TO CHECK PROFILE TO SEE IF IT’S NEEDING UPDATED- Uhhh… It’s pretty basic, but I tend to keep the “meatier” stuff for my posts. /shrug. -pauses right here to go back and update my “Getting to know me” post… haha-
List a few things you think it's important new friends know about you right away: I’m not someone to assume that just because I’m kind, does not mean that I’m a pushover. Additionally, even though I am really into my faith (it’s very important to me), I am not going to beat you over the head with my Bible. I know not everyone believes as I do, but I do know how to play nice with others, and I do know how to just patiently scroll past things that I may find I don’t agree with but would not have something constructive to bring to the conversation about it. :)
You mostly write about: I haven’t dusted off my account for a long time (honestly, I kept forgetting I have it), but at the risk of the whole, “NeW yEaR, nEw Me!” nonsense, I decided in the spirit of working on my stuff with my mental health and all the things going on in my life, in general (not that my life is SUPER exciting, but there’s stuff that I just want to write about and I’m sometimes too lazy [okay, okay, fine, ya caught me, I’m A LOT OF THE TIME too lazy haha] to write it down in my paper journal… I need an outlet, and LJ used to be my go-to for that type of thing, so may as well just come to DW (after all, I did create a DW account for a reason… haha) and do my thought-dumping here.
You never or very rarely write about: Politics. Time and place. I don’t have the time, and I very rarely make time, let alone place, for such nonsense.
Is your journal mostly public, locked, or a mix of public and locked? It’s locked. I have an ex I’m hiding from, and I try to keep specific-specific stuff locked, too, because I do have things going on that I don’t want IRL people to read and then play the “Jump to Conclusions” game (points if you get the reference!).
Do you use filters for certain types of posts (e.g. fandom-related posts, or posts about sex, or mental health issues, etc.)? I do “cut” longer posts, to offer the option to click on the cut if the person wants to keep reading my brain stew. I don’t know how to use the “filters” thing (yet), but if I’m going to write about something that potentially could be upsetting, I will put a trigger warning and offer a short description. For example, if I write about stuff I’d discussed in my therapy sessions that may have need to be further unpacked in here, and there are certain situations that may be triggering, I will offer, “TW: discussion of abuse, [other potential trigger inserted here]. Reader discretion advised!” and I will, regardless if it’s a shorter post or a longer one, put it behind a cut, with the disclaimer additionally labeled in the cut, and once the person clicks on said link to keep reading should they choose to do so, I’ll add an additional TW and multiple mouse scrolls down before the “meat” of the post happens. This is not only to protect the reader from potential sleeping brain goblins they have skulking around their own mind waiting to be bullies, but it is also to thwart the temptation of the reader to jump all over me about things that I post on my account about, “yOu DiDn’T waRn” or whatever else. Where I live, I have to (too often) talk to adults like they are children, even though said adults can – and should – pay attention.
Your posting frequency (e.g. daily, every few days, weekly, etc.): Well, as of today, it’s going to be hopefully daily, but it might be every few days, but at the minimum, a week is the goal, depending upon how busy I am!
Does your journal frequently include any of the following: memes, linkspams, gifs, photos, videos, etc? If I post memes, there won’t be a tonne of them. If I find one that really demands to be included in what I write about, then yes, I will include it. This isn’t my blog, just a “brain dump” space. My blog (which is another thing I need to dust off… oops...), I offer memes and such to the posts. The same goes for videos, links, … it depends on what I happen to be writing (or fussing) about. But all pictures – regardless if they are memes or elsewise – will be put behind a cut. :)
What do you enjoy most about journaling? It is an outlet for me to just organize the thoughts in my head, try to wrangle the brain goblins back into check, or sometimes just document something funny so I can go back and re-read later. Honestly, sometimes it can be – I’ve, personally, discovered – cathartic to go back over things that weren’t funny/lighthearted, after a lot of time has passed, to see how far I’ve come, to check and see where I am now vs then (growth, y’know). Places like this, too, also offer me a place to be able to interact with others, see how things are going with them, that sort of thing. I’m not a super social in-person type of person anymore (when you’re stuffed into your shell repeatedly, but then the same people who continually do the stuffing give “cute” statements of, “You should come out of your shell more!”, you kind of tend to become wary of all human interaction, trying to keep things at a bare minimum so as to not lose your humanness… just … my own opinion!).
How often do you read your friends list (e.g. daily, every other day, once a week, etc.)? Well, now that I’m going to be working at becoming more active on here, once I hop on to type stuff out that I need to get out of my head and put somewhere else so I can organize my own thoughts, I will make a vested effort to be a “frequent flyer” and check in on my friends list, too. After all, the connections are there, and I hate being a parenthetical presence in other people’s lives, I know how lonely that can be, so I try to be that person who makes a point to show up for people I care about.
You really enjoy reading about: Just be real. Don’t gotta be super detailed, don’t gotta offer all the personal details of your life, but if you’ve got something to say, I’ll read it. :) If there’s something I can bring to the proverbial conversation, I will. If it’s something you want to vent about, I’ll read it. Something funny you want to share with others? I’ll read it.
You have very little interest in reading about: Again, politics. Time and place. I don’t have the time, and I don’t make much space for those types of conversations. I also don’t have time for people spinning their stories where they’re “always” the victim in the narrative. I believe there are three sides to all stories: Person A’s, Person B’s, and the truth. I’m a pretty open-minded individual, not so much so my brain’s going to splatter out of my skull and onto the floor, but I’m also not willing to engage in arguments, either. While no, I’m not confrontational, I’m not going to be baited into an argument that really has zero reason to be had.
Your thoughts on journals that regularly include any of the following: memes, linkspams, gifs, photos, videos, etc? I prefer an even balance of this type of content and actual posts. If it’s strictly this type of content, if something catches my eye, sure I’ll read it, but if it doesn’t, then no harm, no foul. Either way, a person’s account is for their own use, and I’m not here to “police” what a person can/cannot post on their account. Just as I expect people to be respectful of the fact that what I post on my account, my account is for me to do with as I please.
When it comes to comments on your posts, what matters more -- quality or quantity? Quality. HANDS DOWN. QUAL-I-TY. :) Not everything needs a response.
Do you unfriend people who don't comment much, even if you know they are reading you regularly? The same way I would treat an IRL person in my life: you’d have to do something profoundly messed up for me to unfriend you, or you would just have to be a generally difficult person to be around – whether it is in person or in the wild, wild internet – because I do not have time (nor patience) to be around difficult people.
What is your approach when it comes to commenting on other journals? As I mentioned earlier, I will comment if I have something to add to the conversation. Not everything needs a reply, but if I feel like I have something of substance to say, I will.
When you friend someone, but things don't really click, do you unfriend them without warning, or do you send them a note first? How do you prefer to be unfriended in similar circumstances? Listen, man, if we don’t really click, the sun’s still gonna rise and set as it is intended to do so. No harm, no foul. If we don’t mesh, that’s okay. If you want to just quietly exit stage left, then that’s fine! I’m not going to chase after you and beg for an explanation. Same goes from my end of the equation: if we don’t mesh, for whatever the reason, I hope that it is understood that I will likely not give an explanation, either. If we just don’t click, we don’t click. No worries.
AND LASTLY
Friending memes often ask people to list their favourite TV shows, movies, books, etc., but more often than not, those aren't things people actually write about in their journal. Do you have any favourite TV shows, movies, books, etc., that you DO often write about -- not necessarily in a fandom sort of way, just in general? Hooooboy. How to answer this question… So. The short answer is, my journal is going to be a variety of things I’ll write about. Books, movies, telly shows (I really don’t watch telly, unless you count stuff I watch regularly on Hulu, etc.), yes, if there’s something I want to pick apart, comment about on my journal, yes. I’ll write about just about anything that crosses my mind and I want to pick it apart further.
Any final thoughts you'd like to share with potential new friends? I am not here for dates. I’m not here for people to “slide into the Dms” as they say and try to flirt with me. I am happy with where my life is, right now, how it is, and I’m not interested in anything more than that. Facebook has too many creeps (which is another reason I’m trying to get away from frequently using that site… what a cesspool it’s become!), I will just, on sight, block anyone who dares try to attempt such with me. I do not have time for any of that nonsense. I’m too old, too tired, and too set in my ways to budge on that. I am here to interact with other humans about life, not try to add someone to mine on THAT personal of a level. Don’t waste my time, and you won’t end up at my personal Block Party (see what I did there?).
(no subject)
Date: 2025-01-09 11:34 pm (UTC)If you think we'd vibe, feel free to send an add. :)
Hello ^_^
Date: 2025-01-13 11:30 pm (UTC)